The ghost of us

I remember that sofa, when we had those big gatherings and we use to sit

beside each other making fun of everybody’s outfit.

The kitchen, where you use to make me breakfast while telling me your darkest

secrets after those terrible nightmares you had.

That stool, where we made love for the first time I laugh, we almost fell

I love it how you called me baby, you were so kind and sweet

Remember that vase, we bought it at the flea market after

that big fight with my parents because we were moving in together.

They said I was too young and I should of listened.

Now the ghost of you is haunting me and won’t let me breathe.

I remember this scarf, I had it on the day you met her.

It was like your demeanor changed, you made your decision on

that day to betray me with her.

I could tell, it was much more than carnal affliction, it was spiritual.

The ghost of us will haunt me for eternity

So I must leave this behind if I want a chance at a better life

If I want to move on as you have.

She is from Venezuela, your new girl…..

From what I hear, together you will never be us.

For the ghost of us haunts you as well

You pretend to be happy with her, I know it

The way you laugh or smile it is so fake, I hear.

But then again maybe I am hearing what I wanna hear…………

The rising phoenix

She wore a messenger bag,
With nothing in her bag but hope….
Nothing in her heart but love.
Disillusioned with life….
And still every morning she will rise.

Hand to mouth with the Lord.
Begging for a new perspective.
Scared that she will trail off into no mans land…..
The type you see under the bridge.
You know those who have given up the ghost. The holy spirit who guides us into sanity.

She wears a hat because she’s cool, trying to fit in a world who disregards her every effort.

She hides in her words because all she’s been told by her educators is that she can write. Unique is what one said, different the other.

She leaves traces of her ancestors…you know……the rappers who built her up.Hiphop overcame poverty by speaking out.

See we live in a world where we lie with each other, intimacy is worthless. We hope that time moves but it seems endless.

A world where we use material things for badges.
Foreign things we can’t pronounce.

See I live in the innercity where food is scarce because of our self indulgence. Whether sex, money or good cuisine. You see us busting ourselves to earn the same things out in the world.

Yet she’s patient waiting just to taste it. Freedom is what she yearns for to make it. Atleast from the darkness she dove into, embraced it.

I had it in my hand but due to a trance from an unknown man I swam but the current got to me. I faced it, bring me out this hole. I’ll make it.

Lord I pray tonight for her.
To rise above her obstacles. The strong hold got her like a roaring lion. That seeks to devour its prey.

But I know another Lion the one from the tribe of Judah.
Him I call triumphant.
Because theres no company like his trust me I know.

In the solitude of my despair.
I yell… the mountains.
Deliver me oh Lord from my inner forces, that expect me to degrade the very thing you’ve built.

You and I are one theres no one else holding my hand.

When the mosquitoes use to bite me you would send a breeze that would soothe me. Then drift off to sleep.

Like the days of the coach where you would fill my wildest dreams.
….Leaving me to dream I surely was the choosen one.
Overcompensating for my lack thereoff……

So she picked up her messenger bag and imparted empathy. To the people who are just like her.

He begs to refrain from your impulses…..develop an intelect that will encourage my kin.
But then I ask myself how will I win.

Forget to win, for the souls are mine to keep. A crown I promise but not of a queen…
A princess you are a princess you’ ll always be…..Forget the world just follow me.
Into eternity. What have I shown you. That they spat in your face, they throw their bones at you.

For the risen phoenix just like my mother said will for ever be a fantasy. Babygirl it’s in your head.